Read Your Local Papers

Everyday my Mom reads the paper, like many of you I am sure. She is most interested in the local stories. Mom reads just about every inch of the thing every morning, but she especially likes to look for articles that include people she knows like her neighbors, patients and fellow Church members. Mom enjoys the funnies. That is what we call the cartoon/comic part in the FYI section of our local paper, The Kansas City Star. She always enjoys a good laugh when reading For Better or For Worse because the Dad is a Dentist, too.

When we were younger I can remember she would always share the funnies that aren't necessarily in the funny section of the paper. As we have grown older she does not usually read them to us, but instead hands over the article to one... watches them crack up... then she cracks up again watching the one who has just read it laugh their butt off. This repeats until the article has been passed to all of us... then we all laugh hysterically together. Well, I would be remiss not sharing last weeks funnies with you...

Death Ruled a Homicide
The death of Helmut Guttmann, 97, has been ruled a homicide. Gutmann dies of complication of a broken hip after he was reportedly pushed by former pro wrestling star Verne Gagne (click to see Verne in his hay day.)
Gagne, 83, reportedly threw Gutmann to the floor at a nursing home in Bloomington, Minn. Both me suffered from dementia. Gagne was a pro wrestler in the 1950s.

Upon first reading this my brother, Sean, and I both were in shock that a pro wrestler would go and throw a poor elderly man.. until we saw that Mr. Gagne (the pro wrestler) himself was elderly.

Really? Utah?
ABC News flash: Eight of the top 10 online porn-consuming states voted Republican in the 2008 presidental election.

There weren't huge differences between all the states, according to the review of two years of credit card data. But after adjusting for broadband Internet access between states-porn's a bandwidth hog-it turns out the biggest consumer, UTAH, averaged 5.47 adult content subscriptions per 1,000 home users. Montana was the least with 1.92 per 1,000.

Old-fashioned values came through: Churchgoers bought slightly less online on Sundays. States banning gay marriages had 11 percent more subscriber than states that don't.

I find this interesting... very interesting. That is all I am going to say.

THIS ONE IS THE BEST.....

KETTERING, Ohio — A Harrison Twp. woman faces child endangering charges after police said she admitted to breastfeeding her child and talking on a cell phone while driving, according to Kettering Police Officer Michael Burke.

A male motorist called the police department's non-emergency number to report that he had seen the woman breastfeeding and talking on a cell phone while driving, Burke said. The man reported that he also witnessed the woman driving a Honda minivan into the parking lot of a local school and saw some children get out of the van. The man then got the van's license plate number and called police.

"I tried to say something to her. She literally has the little girl on the steering wheel and I said, 'I can't believe you have that kid in your lap and she said, 'You want to pop your titty out and breastfeed this kid?' That's what she said to me. I'm like, 'You can feed your kid when you stop.' It's like wet out here. It's full of traffic. It's ridiculous. She's got like three other kids in the car."

When a police officer spoke to her, she admitted she breastfed her child and also told police that she does not deprive her child when the child is hungry, Burke said.

The officer took the information and presented it to the city prosecutor's office. That's when Genine Compton, 39, of Elm Grove in Harrison Twp., was charged with a first-degree misdemeanor of child endangering and minor misdemeanor for unlawfully restraining her child, which Burke believes was under 2.

When police were unsuccessful with serving Compton her ticket and a court summons at her home on Friday, Feb. 27, an officer went to the school where the witness saw her drop off the children on Thursday morning. The officer used the descriptions the witness gave to locate Compton at the school and serve the tickets and summons, Burke said. Compton was not arrested.

When asked why the tickets and summons couldn't be mailed, Burke said, "It's legal documents. We have to personally serve them to the defendant."

If convicted of the child endangering charge, Compton could face up to 180 days in jail and fined between $1,500 and $1,800, Burke said. If convicted of the unlawful restraint charge, Compton could be fined up to $150.

"Our issue is not the fact that this woman was breastfeeding in public," Burke said. He added that Compton would have been charged even if the child was just sitting on her lap. "Our issue is that she created the condition that placed her child's health and safety at risk."

Lord bless those children for being cursed with this Mother. I am not sure they have a chance.

This one was a goodie for more than one reason... 1. Breastfeeding while driving... a new sport perhaps? 2. She said titty. I have only really heard someone say that word about 3 times in my life... all three times I just about lost it I was laughing so hard. Then, to see it in quotes... in the paper... it was just too much for me to bare. 3. I think this Mom's choice of vocabulary says it all about her... classy. 4. I bet the teacher working in the carpool lane when this Mother dropped off her other kids at school saw waaaaay too much. 5. Ohio is one state that I have never visited and this doesn't make me want to anytime soon!

Now, as you can see the paper is not just to be informed with what is going on in the world: war, famine, President Obama raising taxes and crosswords.... No, it is much... MUCH... more...